A normal day...
Divorce seems to be the operative word for this blog lately, but there is so much more to my life than just being swallowed whole by a growing-uglie-every-day divorce. I have been blessedly busy with just the day to day routine of breathing in and out and raising four kids. I've been single parenting since April and separated since December. Here's a quick run down of my kids and a day in our life...
I have four great kids. Oldest is a sophomore this year and a star CC and track athlete, ROTC student of merit and solid pre-AP student. He is protective and slightly angry at what his father is doing, but also tenderhearted and hilarious.
Second is quieter, industrious and also very tenderhearted. He has a longer memory and holds a grudge when he feels he or his have been slighted. When we home-schooled, Second was known as the Informer. If something went awry on the playground we could always get the fair skinny on what went down. He is also a gifted academic, well-liked by classmates and solid athlete.
Daughter is very, very sensitive and as hilarious as her oldest brother who she alternately loves and drives batshit crazy. They have elevated this behavior into an art-form which alternately amuses me and drives ME batshit crazy.She's a great student, too.
Little Guy, like the rest of his sibs has huge, big, brown eyes, long lashes and unlike his sibs, an adorable lisp that makes "girl" sound like "guhl". He's funny and slightly stubborn like Second.
Our day looks like this so far and like a reader said on Facebook, adhering to new routines has been really useful. By nature I'mfairly ridiculously Type A.We are up at 530. The night before all clothes and school items are laid out or put in the truck. While they dress, I make breakfast. I leave some in the microwave for Knight when he gets home at six thirty or seven from Nightwatch. He has been staying with us since the drivebys and harrassment started and prior to that the kids had been gradually introduced to him. Thankfully, they all seem to like him very much.
I thought long and hard about telling them about him, but Daughter had developed stomach trouble int he last couple of months from stress and so one night in the ER I just came clean. I told them what was really going on. Why we were in counseling. That Dad knew about Knight and that he had been upset when Knight left and I still didn't want to get back together. I told them about Dad's family and all the things they had done to me over the years that I had stayed silent about. I told them that I had asked Dad to address it over the years but that he didn't take me seriously until it was too late. It was just too little too late.
I will talk about this more, but what I got out of the conversation was that they knew alot more than I thought and that they understood both my and Dad's personality to the extent that I was just confirming what they already knew in one way or the other and that they sincerely believed I had tried my best. It was humbling.
ANYWAY.
After we dress, I pack up breakfast while Oldest feeds and walks the dog and does the garbage. They all brush their teeth and take their vitamins and then we load up. At 605 we leave and head over the causeway to drop off Oldest at the highschool for Cross Country and then drive a few more blocks to the Catholic School where all of them are on scholarship and grants. It took some doing and some financial sacrifice, but I really wanted to fight to keep them in their school. Stoic thinks our ISD is fine. Ohhhh but it's not.
When we get here to the school, they eat their breakfast, we go over homework, read, brush their teeth again. or use the laptop. I also sign whatever needs signing and generally check in with the kids. After that I leave about 745 and go back to the highschool, pick up Oldest and we run errands or just head back to the house to do laundry, prep dinner, job hunt, houseclean etc.
At 230 I come back to the island to pick up Little Guy and we stay to help with volleyball and soccer since Second plays soccer and Daughter plays volleyball. We also work on homework and run more errands. For instance yesterday I hit the drycleaner, Gamestop for a birthday buy, gas station and library to turn in books and check out something Daughter needed for school. At 530 we usually get home and I put Little guy in the bath, have the other two reload their sports gear for the next day, put out whatever they need for the morning and get started on homework. At some point each rotates to the shower after little Guy.
By then we have dinner, finish up chores and homework and have time to read or get on the computer. We don't use the tv or xbox during the week and I think it helps with the climate of the house during a busy school week.
By nine everyone is sleeping though I think we are going to push bedtime back tonight, it seems like they need more sleep. While Knight is getting ready for work, they go to bed, I iron uniforms including Knight's (who will go to work rumpled with no compunction whatsoever lol), make lunches for everyone and get him off to work.
Do I make lists? Yes.
Is the day fast? YES.
Knight alone has upteen things to take and I'm better at keeping him organized than he is. lol
Throw him in with the kids and it's hilarious sometimes.
The kids see him as an ally in thwarting vitamins, ironed clothes and vegetables with dinner.
Oldest and he were complaining about vitamins and laughing at their similar attitudes when Oldest grins at me and says, "Hey mom, I sense a disturbance in the force."
We'll just see about that. lol
I have four great kids. Oldest is a sophomore this year and a star CC and track athlete, ROTC student of merit and solid pre-AP student. He is protective and slightly angry at what his father is doing, but also tenderhearted and hilarious.
Second is quieter, industrious and also very tenderhearted. He has a longer memory and holds a grudge when he feels he or his have been slighted. When we home-schooled, Second was known as the Informer. If something went awry on the playground we could always get the fair skinny on what went down. He is also a gifted academic, well-liked by classmates and solid athlete.
Daughter is very, very sensitive and as hilarious as her oldest brother who she alternately loves and drives batshit crazy. They have elevated this behavior into an art-form which alternately amuses me and drives ME batshit crazy.She's a great student, too.
Little Guy, like the rest of his sibs has huge, big, brown eyes, long lashes and unlike his sibs, an adorable lisp that makes "girl" sound like "guhl". He's funny and slightly stubborn like Second.
Our day looks like this so far and like a reader said on Facebook, adhering to new routines has been really useful. By nature I'm
I thought long and hard about telling them about him, but Daughter had developed stomach trouble int he last couple of months from stress and so one night in the ER I just came clean. I told them what was really going on. Why we were in counseling. That Dad knew about Knight and that he had been upset when Knight left and I still didn't want to get back together. I told them about Dad's family and all the things they had done to me over the years that I had stayed silent about. I told them that I had asked Dad to address it over the years but that he didn't take me seriously until it was too late. It was just too little too late.
I will talk about this more, but what I got out of the conversation was that they knew alot more than I thought and that they understood both my and Dad's personality to the extent that I was just confirming what they already knew in one way or the other and that they sincerely believed I had tried my best. It was humbling.
ANYWAY.
After we dress, I pack up breakfast while Oldest feeds and walks the dog and does the garbage. They all brush their teeth and take their vitamins and then we load up. At 605 we leave and head over the causeway to drop off Oldest at the highschool for Cross Country and then drive a few more blocks to the Catholic School where all of them are on scholarship and grants. It took some doing and some financial sacrifice, but I really wanted to fight to keep them in their school. Stoic thinks our ISD is fine. Ohhhh but it's not.
When we get here to the school, they eat their breakfast, we go over homework, read, brush their teeth again. or use the laptop. I also sign whatever needs signing and generally check in with the kids. After that I leave about 745 and go back to the highschool, pick up Oldest and we run errands or just head back to the house to do laundry, prep dinner, job hunt, houseclean etc.
At 230 I come back to the island to pick up Little Guy and we stay to help with volleyball and soccer since Second plays soccer and Daughter plays volleyball. We also work on homework and run more errands. For instance yesterday I hit the drycleaner, Gamestop for a birthday buy, gas station and library to turn in books and check out something Daughter needed for school. At 530 we usually get home and I put Little guy in the bath, have the other two reload their sports gear for the next day, put out whatever they need for the morning and get started on homework. At some point each rotates to the shower after little Guy.
By then we have dinner, finish up chores and homework and have time to read or get on the computer. We don't use the tv or xbox during the week and I think it helps with the climate of the house during a busy school week.
By nine everyone is sleeping though I think we are going to push bedtime back tonight, it seems like they need more sleep. While Knight is getting ready for work, they go to bed, I iron uniforms including Knight's (who will go to work rumpled with no compunction whatsoever lol), make lunches for everyone and get him off to work.
Do I make lists? Yes.
Is the day fast? YES.
Knight alone has upteen things to take and I'm better at keeping him organized than he is. lol
Throw him in with the kids and it's hilarious sometimes.
The kids see him as an ally in thwarting vitamins, ironed clothes and vegetables with dinner.
Oldest and he were complaining about vitamins and laughing at their similar attitudes when Oldest grins at me and says, "Hey mom, I sense a disturbance in the force."
We'll just see about that. lol
I am exhausted just reading your "every day we do" list.
ReplyDeleteYou are a GREAT Mum!
Pax
No wonder Mr T is so pissed... To miss out on being around those cool pups day after day... I'm pretty sure its not just about you. Both times I lost my families it was the lack of my little heart-and-souls that ripped the stuffing out of me,caused me to stare through walls for hours at a time missing them.
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